I just want to say that even though I was extremely fearful and had reason to doubt that this relationship would be good as I got married to her, it is most often sweet, tender and wonderful. The fear as wet fueled most of my OCD. But our marriage is an extreme blessing to meContinue reading “Difficult sex but wonderful love”
There are times that I really dislike my new bride. Just little things she does that annoy me. Or thought processes she has or certain personality traits. Sometimes just the tone of her voice when she’s around certain people. But I’ve realized that even if I don’t like her at times that doesn’t mean weContinue reading “Not liking her doesn’t have to make you unhappy”
I was scared that I would be unhappy in a relationship because of who the other person was. But as we’ve been married I no longer have to worry about if this is the right person or not, and instead I just have to figure out how do I make us happy. Everyone has differentContinue reading “I am in control of our happiness”
So I realize that a big part of OCD is the fear that drives it. My fear was that I would be unhappy in marriage and that I would find and focus on any reason that this might live out to be true. But I have found ways to really make marriage fun. And theContinue reading “The fear goes away”
I talked with a friend of mine who is in his 60s and got divorced three years ago. He talked about things that he’s just learning that I already knew, whether it be through my church community or through Counseling or through friends. So I thought it worth stating these things so that others won’tContinue reading “What we’ve learned from the past generation”
The love of my wife is a fragile thing. I recognized myself thinking and asking myself this morning, is my wife really attractive or am I deceiving myself. She definitely has her flaws. For most, this may sound like a ridiculous thought but for someone with relationship OCD it’s a dangerous one. I had toContinue reading “It is a fragile thing”
I just remembered a technique that an old OCD therapist of mine recommended. She said not only should you drop the thought when you can but you can actually make fun of the thought or the force that’s making you think it. What she meant was when you have a thought you can try toContinue reading “Laugh at OCD”
One negative thought that puts us in a bad mood is so much more dangerous than just one single thought because it can create an attitude that draws up all other negative thoughts in the area and mount an argument within us against the good.
I usually despise cleaning if it takes much more than 10 minutes. But this whole morning I found myself cleaning the house because B is coming home today. And I know she likes a clean house. And I’m doing it joyfully! Marriage is a funny thing.
I realized the most dangerous thought of my OCD brain always orbits back to this. “It isn’t supposed to be this hard.” Our relationship is hard. There is a lot she says that bothers me. She’s sweet, but often sounds incredibly dumb and socially unaware to me. Other times she has the most stable wisdomContinue reading “My most dangerous thought”